Dear TomHa,
What an exhausting weekend, although I do not seriously think that I had done much things. Haha. Well, finished Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince yesterday (at Borders. $40.60 is just too much) and I must say that it is really much much better than its predecessor, the Order of Phoenix, which portrayed the protagonist as more of a spoilt, whiny and arrogant brat than The One of the wozarding community. Beware.. Spoliers ahead. Somehow died, or rather, D died, which is rather sad, going by the events that had occurred these few weeks and that they were rather associated with me. No matter. Potter became rather powerful, coupled with the fact that he had associated himself with some rather powerful dark spells invented by the Half-Blood Prince who happened to be the "teacher he had hated most in his term in Hogwarts." However, what that had actually left me feeling rather appalled was how liberal the wizarding community actually was. Ron apparently found himself a girlfriend with an apparent ease (to spite hermione and to prove that he knows how to kiss to his sister) that just filled me so much disgust. Lucky them...

Anyway, after finishing my read at Borders, I set out for a walk along Orchard Road, jostling my way through the bustling crowds to Plaza Singapura where 190 had always been rather empty and I could sit my way home. Along the way, was contemplating how I was to write this entry, whining about how lonely and apparently how unsociable I am when I got picked out from the crowd by my secondary school classmates who were with their Junior College friends and were going to meet their upper secondary classmates. Complicated ar? No matter, decided that I was really feeling rather hungry and joined them for supper, at subway, where I solemnly swear makes nasty tasting sandwiches. Walking with them just means that at the end of the day, my displacement will be 0 many many times over. No matter. It is always good to have company in a lonesome night where the moon is so obscured by the looming red clouds. Made many super lame jokes. Guessed those whom I newly met weren't taking it rather well. Well, what to do, was really on form yesternight. Then, they decided to go for a spin in my classmates' car which I gladly obliged. Realised that I can really become a taxi driver should I ever get retrenched or what. My knowledge of the roads was rather, hmm, how should I say it, extensive. Reached home at around 2.30am. Goofed around, slept at 4.

Hoisted myself out of bed at 8 and made my way for the Civil Defense Volunteering course, where I learnt some first aid which is quite elementary and some firefighting, which is, er, not the most exciting of things. Had free buffet. Perhaps that was why I did not enjoy the 拉面 later. Then, like always, doing what I and perhaps every of my friend that I know well do best, goofed around and joked around and like always, I am always the one who get 鸟. Hmmm... Perhaps I am too nice. Ha, had my first coffee bean since A's. Felt rather high after all the caffeine.

Been thinking a lot about the London bombings these few days. Yes, it is a very tragic event to happen to a place which I really want to go 7 years later (started saving already, and hopefully, can get a partner to go with me??! Haha). No matter about the Olymipics, which by itself is a rather 'future' thing, but what that really bothers me is the lack of press release that actually dwell into why those terrorrists actually contemplated to even think of such hideous acts of violence in the first place? Was it an ideological thing? Or was it just another sort of sadistic act of revenge on those who are apparently richer at the expense of someone else getting poorer? Looking back, could still remember that particular geopolitics lecture which actually dwelled into the minds of these terrorists. Not that the lecturers agree with what those people are doing, but somehow, the lecture stuck with me. It talked about the Israel and Palestinian conflict (again). Israel, with all the backing from USA was much much superior militarily than the Palestinians who were by and large, AK-47 wielding peasants. Knowing that going head-on with the Israelis can only mean instant defeat, the Palestinians set about commiting acts of violence in the form of suicide bombings and random acts of terrorism to exert their stand on this long standing feud. Hence, Sharon build a security barrier that is just another of those barrier that sets about to encroach on Palestinian land, much much beyond the assumably agreed Green Line border. Naturally, the Arabs were incessed with this move by the Jews but the barrier of high walls with tanks and big weapons guarding it proved to be a much formidable opponent. Acts of terrorism dropped but however, can you sya the same thing about the oppression faced by the much poorer arabs living behind the walls where some of their basic amenities like the hospitals and markets lie behind the wall, on the land which was formerly agreed by their leaders to be theirs. There was this feature on this terrorist who was the elder son of this lady who, though pregnant, was denied entry to the hospital on the other side due to her lack of papers. She was forced to stay behind, denied of the amenities to ease her delivery of a new life into a rather troubled and violent world. Yes, the Israeli Army was cruel and never realised that such acts would only serve to offer more recruits to the terrorists network. Yes, the son became a terrorist and blew himself and dozens more up in a bus during a prime time weekday in Israeli land. But could we really blame him? Was he being morally or mentally unsound to have done all those acts of unforgiveness? I doubt... The Jews on the other hand, being homeless after WWII, were given a land in the form of Israel, were, however, oppressed by the surrounding Arab states and fought back with a formidable ally-The USA, in the six-day war to beat those states soundly and then they became the oppressor, in revenge for how they were treated. Were they right then? Again I doubt.

2 wrongs does not make 1 right. However, before we call for the heads of those terrorist, shouldn't we be trying to understand what propelled them into these violent insanity? The Londoners affected were tragic and my heart goes out to them. But before the rich goes on another culling of the maligned, can't we at least spare some moments of serious consideration for what went on in the minds of those terrorists? Do not turn them into villains without first looking into the matter deeply with some sympathy. Perhaps last week's Newsweek or newspapers had looked into what I had said. I hadn't looked at them. But then again, look at the whole picture before passing judjment. I never believed that man's basic instinct was to kill.

On Maturity
Dear TomHa,
It just suddenly occurred to me that I had or rather, have a blog which I once update with so much fervor. Then why the lag in updates? A lack of events? hardly, the few weeks had been really purposeful and boy did they pass by so quickly and so fast, I just cannot believe that July is actually ending soon. Darn, which also means, school's reopening soon and boy am I hating this dreadful feeling of 背着书包上学堂. The feeling is just irksome. Sad events, meaningful events, funny ones, and also, some that makes you see your true self in brighter and clearer light.

Of course, if you actually think that I am actually going to recount all those events one by one then you are darn wrong, because some are just too sad to be recounted and when you look bad you wouldn't want to have anything to do with it. Yes, tribulations, turbulences, birth, sickness, and death are part of life and I suppose that when you look back, you wouldn't want to be looking back in the first place. Forgive my murmmurings over here.

So I am just going to go back to the topic which this title actually suggests, on maturity. All my nineTEEN years of life, the only definition of maturity that I had come about and felt deeply most about would be taking responsibility. Afterall, you would not be called a matured person if you can't even complete the task of being responsible to yourself and the people around you.

Responsibility encompasses a lot of things. It involves you taking responsibility for your actions, what you speak and even, what you think. It really involves in you being answerable to not only yourself, but also, those around you, whether they get affected or not. When you make a decision, can you be answerable to the fact that you had done whatever in your might to please the people around you and yourself. Thus, it is never easy to be a matured person and of course comes a price tag. That you would be sacrificing your freedom to excercise whatever you want, whenever you like it. That should be a part of maturity, whether you like it or not.

So in the end, after playing around for one full circle, we come to the point of being accountable. Does it mean to be irresponsible to quit a society by issuing a letter of resignation to everyone in that society or would you rather someone who never appears in that place ever again and changed his handphone number to make himself uncontactable? Does it mean to be immature or worse, childish when you go all out to make sure that the people around you have fun by acting stupid and giving nonsensical jokes that aren't even funny? Does it mean to be a responsible person when you can't even be responsible to your family needs when, your kins aren't able to provide the kind of life that you seek and yet you still go about seeking it? Is it even responsible to act like you do not give two hoots about the whole wide world, when your friends just wanna hang out with you and take a peek or two at how you are getting on with life and yet all they get is rude comments?

All right I am done with questioning. So in conclusion, maturity just means being accountable to yourself, and the people around you. In my opinion, my brand of maturity is to try and make people laugh with my brand of humor which is rather unfunny. Laughter makes the world a better place. For that, I think that comedians who can actually make people laugh their hearts out are just great people. Jack Neo, Stephen Chow, and many others who had make you laughed till tears and stomache come acalling to give your white blood cells a battle are just great personalities to emulate. Sure there are times to be serious. But if you think about it, in the end, the reason why people are serious is so that they can relax in the end. So in the end, is my ambition going to change albeit again from being a firefighter? Perhaps not, in fact, it just strengthens my resolve to be one. One who is serious in rescuing the people from the fires and disaster, and also, one who is able to cheer the survivors up. Afterall, I supposed that it is considerable harder for survivors than those who, unfortunately, passed on to the other world in the aftermath of the disaster.

Cheers!